Crossing Milestones

Life is a continuing series of milestones; to where, one is not sure. We just keep crossing each as we go and mostly its only after we cross one do we realize the significance.

The week before last, we had relatives coming over for a few days from Kerala. We went with them on a trip. We went without my elder son. He was Home Alone for the first time- that is overnight. He has stayed back many times when we went for short outings. Well, this time he was to represent his school in a few Interschool competitions and there was no way he could accompany us. I was a bit apprehensive, but he was thrilled to stay back on his own. My husband too felt that we should allow him to stay back. After a million instructions, we left without him. My younger son was in tears as he waved Goodbye to his ettan (elder brother). It was not a long trip, we would be back by the next evening.

Anyways, he managed well- without ME! I was happy, relieved and yet there was a vague sense of loss…Because it reminds me that I’m slowly nearing the phase when he will become truly independent and realise that I’m having mixed feelings.

Today, when I’m composing mails/ blogs, and they intrude into my thoughts, I sometimes get impatient and ask them to leave me alone - tomorrow when they leave the nest- will my space and time mock me?

Of late, I’ve been reading so many tags abt “Heights”-concerning babies/ toddlers of the bloggers. And I find myself yearning to be around a baby, hold, cuddle a baby…