Tuesday, November 28, 2006

For a daughter…

This started of as a comment to a post by mommy of2 but I had a hunch it would get a bit long, so decided to post it as a blog.

I’m a mother of two sons- two sons who are my very life. However, I had always yearned for a daughter; right from the time I first started wondering what it would feel like to become a mother.

When my first son was born, I thought that I could still perhaps have a daughter. Then when I was informed that my second baby was also going to be a son, I came home and cried bitterly. Though today I can look back at that day with detachment, I remember I had felt very sad. Of course, I reminded myself to be grateful and pray for a healthy baby. For the next few years after the birth of my second son, I did feel a pang whenever I heard of a birth of a baby girl to a friend or relative.

Today, as I look at my younger son, I feel no regrets. I very consciously and deliberately trained myself not to think about daughters with longing. I just refused to let my thoughts go there and I can say that I managed to succeed in detaching myself from the yearning that I once nurtured. I’ve also succeeded in desensitizing myself from random insensitive comments that sometimes still come my way. Today I can look at little girls with happiness, fondness, pure affection without any remnant pangs.

I have two little girls coming to me for tuitions and I enjoy my time with them. I get to see several little cute girls at the dance class- and I love watching them, hearing them talk.

Today, I’m grateful for my sons and I just want them to grow up as good persons.


mommyof2 said...

don't forget, you WILL have 2 daughters after ur sons get married:-)

Ardra said...

yes- very true...:-)

The Mad Momma said...

not just two daughters.. two very grateful daughters.. as i wrote in a post long ago... there is no point bringing up a daughter knowing that some family or man will try to oppress her... if you, tharini and itchingtowrite etc bring up your sons the way i see you all, with a great sense of responsibility, fairness and affection.. someday two girls will kiss your feet and thank you for giving them great husbands!!!

Shankari said...

My 1st child was the 'dream daughter', so obviously i wanted to be greedy and have another!

But now when I have a little boy who dotes on me, I am so grateful to have one of each. :)

WhatsInAName said...

WOW! Your writeup touched a chord cos I sometimes miss a son :)