Saturday, April 03, 2021

The women of the past generation- the great indian kitchen

 


They were always in a rush- every cell of their body was trained to move in haste as if on wheels.

Fear, devotion, deference and servility were their hallmarks in all situations.  


Moreover, society had already convinced them that their foremost duty, responsibility and above all love towards the family could be demonstrated only through untiring service day in and day out.  Their very existence was built around these notions. If questioned, they would emphatically insist that they nursed no grievance, no complaints and bore no resentment or bitterness. It was all about complicit compliance. 

They would be in the grip of fear and anxiety in most circumstances. They dreaded being the cause for any delay- they shuddered at the thought of being admonished and humiliated in public and were ready to go to any lengths to escape the wrath of the men in charge. Often, they wouldn’t be given time to even dress properly- and there were occasions when they wouldn’t even have had the time to wear their slippers when stepping out of the house!

And in spite of taking all precautions, it was still possible that some obscure reason would be found to upbraid them- and this they would endure with a profound sense of self-reproach,  fully believing that they deserved to be admonished.  

They enumerate with immense pride and sense of achievement, stories of the umpteen number of  dishes they have cooked, the innumerable guests they have served, and the countless vessels they have washed for years together.

 

They laud and encourage  other women who have lived similar lives- they believe that however huge a responsibility or post a woman might hold professionally, it is still desirable that she displays exemplary culinary skills, rejoices in celebrating festivals, entertaining guests, extending impeccable hospitality at every possible opportunity.

 

It is highly probable that the women of the erstwhile generation would condemn the movie ‘The Great Indian Kitchen’. After all, it would not be easy for them to let go of these deeply embedded values overnight – values that they had been holding close for years together with utmost commitment. Besides, it would mean negating a lifetime of toil and care – why -the very purpose of their existence would be invalidated!  


#thegreatindiankitchen #thegreatindiankitchenmalayalam #thegreatindiankitchentamil


Thursday, January 21, 2021

A girl gets married to the Kitchen- The Great Indian Kitchen!🤭


Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.😉


It was no longer her battle. The kitchen was no longer a platform to prove her efficiency as a homemaker. To cook or not to cook was purely her choice. But it had not been like this always.  Watching the movie- 'The Great Indian Kitchen' brought to the surface the memories that had been buried for years now-

How she was reprimanded for not remembering to keep the jug of water on the dining table- at lunchtime.

How she was shamed because the buckets were not sparkling.

How the ladies had to remain in ‘attendance’ while the men were eating and not  be chatting shamelessly with one another in the kitchen- delaying to serve crispy hot dosas straight from the pan.

How one had to bathe early in the morning- dress up well with the bindi and thaali mala in place and not look dishevelled in spite of the chores.

How the entire day was about planning the menu for the next meal-   in elaborate detail. Life was all about – only about and nothing but about planning the menu, cooking, eating and cleaning up. Reading, writing, singing, dancing, drawing- why- even thinking and dreaming was out of bounds...🥴

How by the time the last of the ladies finished lunch it would be time for tea and snacks for the first set of gentlemen! 😀

How after a long tiring journey, one had to immediately sit down to chop and cut humongous jackfruits ('gifted' by loving relatives) to make chips, jam and whatever. While the gents would be resting!

How she was trained to make pickles- while being reminded that she had not been taught such an important life skill at her home, and God forbid if it was festival time or family functions. Waking up at ungodly hours to chop vegetables, scrape and grind coconuts endlessly for the umpteen number of dishes to be cooked.🤦🏽‍♀️

How the very next day after her wedding she was asked to pour idli batter into the idli moulds- while being watched if she managed to do it without spilling it. They were afraid she would make a mess of it- but it was announced: “She needs to be trained”!

How there was the tradition to have the latest recruit/ bride serve the guests during the family function to ensure she knew how to do it right. 

How it was sacrilegious if one's left hand touched the serving dish inadvertently while serving,  how one had to collect and balance the used banana leaves precariously, how one had to pick up the leftovers spilt on the floor, then sprinkle water in one direction- wipe it out with the palm in another- and then the final swab with the assigned piece of cloth- all this under the watchful eyes of critical elders...it was harrowing! 😅

Not being able to slurp one's way through the flowing payasam from the banana leaf was also an unforgivable lapse. 😋😋

How she was called into the office room by well-meaning uncles- and given a dressing down on how to plan her daily chores- maintain a ‘timetable’.

How she was handed a letter- explaining to her in the ‘kindest’ of words that she was being a bad homemaker- bad daughter in law- because sometimes her sulks showed. Because she had to cook full course feast spreads almost every day- and cater to visitors cheerfully.

How even when casual visitors dropped in, they were persuaded to stay back for lunch/ dinner- elaborate ones at that, so much so that relatives used to schedule their shopping expeditions in the city such that they would land up in their house for food knowing very well that they were going to be persuaded to stay for meals. And revelling in the great slogan- ‘Athithi Devo Bhava’, the glory of serving food to people- and special brownie points if they happened to be brahmins! 😇

How she shouldn’t be listening to music as she worked.

How another relative brushed his finger across the shelf and showed her the dust on it...

How she was asked to prepare tea just as she was about to sit thinking the day’s chores were finally done-

How one had to cool the piping hot tea- and then reheat it again because it was a wee bit too cool!

How, if one  handed over the tea a little earlier than usual, one was chided, 'trying to finish off the chores soon eh?"🥴

How one had to prepare the same dish in different ways- with lots of coconut, with a little coconut and with no coconut.😅

How there had to be three types of curds with varying degrees of sourness.😅

How the new sheets had to be changed because they smelt ‘new’!😆🥴

How she used to clean her house top to bottom frantically-  because visitors were arriving the next day- and the thoughtful ‘visitors’ would rearrange every single thing that she had to hunt for things in her own home. And how she was expected to be grateful for this kindness.

How she was ‘taught’ to make sambharam- buttermilk  the right way- with the right ingredients- in the right measure- and then when she prepared the same for another elder- he gave her another lecture on how she had done it all wrong and proceeded to give her another recipe- for preparing buttermilk. 🤷🏾‍♀️🥴

Watching this movie- made her stomach go queasy! She wanted to scream from the rooftops- those well-meaning elders- some had already crossed the threshold- and the others were too old- no point in waging any battle- proving any point  and yet how she wished this movie had been made around 30 years ago…🙄

A girl gets married to the Kitchen- The Great Indian Kitchen!🤭


#thegreatindiankitchen #thegreatindiankitchenmalayalam #thegreatindiankitchentamil