Sunday, January 24, 2016

The spell has broken...

 As I walked down the only too familiar road, I very consciously and deliberately tried to coerce my sleeping memories alive. I searched for familiar sights,  I tried to breathe in familiar smells, I tried to rouse dormant sensations…I tried to retrace my steps, I closed my eyes, visualising images of the past.  

I saw nothing, smelt nothing, felt nothing. It was the same place and yet it was no longer.

 Everything felt unreal, empty. I had grieved the passage of time, yearned for lost moments. Now I had come back but found nothing that I thought I was seeking. Is there a sense of loss?  No, not even that. Just an emptiness and a numbness.

What had changed? The  place? Perhaps…

It is I who have changed. Forever. I am no longer that person.

That place in the depths of my heart no longer exists outside. Finally  I can stop looking for it every time I return. Let sleeping memories lie...

Ref: Nostalgia: thy sting

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