Friday, July 21, 2006

Groping with Reality?

Truth, Reality/ Illusions/delusions- Maya, mirage, horizon- these concepts have been haunting me of late- everything seems so relative- one cannot be sure-

The Mumbai blasts- when I first heard of it, my first reaction was utter dismay, which was soon replaced by panic when I remembered that my 3 cousin sisters, their husbands- all of them traveled by train daily- to and fro from work- I frantically tried to reach them but all phone lines were jammed. I finally managed to contact one of them who assured me that all of them were safe. And then I found the respite to think of all the others who were still in the throes of anxiety and fear for their loved ones. Now my emotion was anger, helpless rage- which found expression in a wave of tears- my younger son who had been watching me all this while kept mumbling: “amme, don’t cry- mema and cheriamma are all safe”. But the tears and sobs did not subside-

I visited the site “Mumbai help” and was amazed at the gesture- faceless strangers- helping other faceless strangers- it was awesome- I’ve no words…

Today after ten days after the incident- Mumbai is “normal” (!!!???) people have expressed their grit, courage, anger, grief, angst, solidarity in several ways- blogging being one of them too- blogspot was banned- and now that has also been cleared- everything is back to ‘normal’.

And I’m wondering about meanings of some words- Truth- Reality-
The understanding of the reality of that one day, the differences in perspectives- how the event has changed different people:

The reality to those who lost their loved one/ones that day- their loss, bereavement- for them it is a singular event- they have to cope with the day to day absence of somebody important in their daily existence…somebody who just stopped coming home one day!

The reality of those in Mumbai who have survived- they’re safe, they’ve resumed life- they are traveling once again in trains- the daily routine- grind-

The reality to those whose loved ones escaped narrowly due to some quirk of Fate/Destiny- they came close to a devastating loss- and managed to escape and survive-

The reality to those like me- who are geographically far away- who have not suffered any direct ‘loss’, and yet watching the aftermath on T.V – the blood- the panic- the sorrow- the pain- of others- whom one doesn’t even know- for us the event is in multitude- we can see it only as a mass rampage- it is scary- its terrifying- its numbing…

The reality to the perpetrators- they, who planned, executed, waited and watched the consequences- their reaction? Are they happy? Satisfied with a deed well accomplished?

Which is the Truth? Reality?

1 comment:

GettingThere said...

Hey! You weren't blogging for a long time and I missed you. Then I just got very busy and couuldn't visit your blog for a long itme. Welcome back!

I can identify with what you must have felt. I was far away from the chaos, but we have friends and family (and friends who have family) in Mumbai. It was an afternoon full of anxiety for us (that is when we knew about it). Really, I sometimes wonder too - what is going through the minds of these murderers when this happens? Do they ever feel remorse?

By the way, I tagged you. Look up my latest post for details.